Wanna Look Young? Don't Wear Heavy Earrings!

Here's an example of GOOD ear sag. Awwwww.

I'm probably going to ignite a firestorm of protest here, but I've watched 'Two and a Half Men.' Yes, the show is totally inappropriate. However, one episode really cemented for me a huge OCD issue of mine: saggy earlobes.

Charlie Harper, the drunken 40 something sleazebag star, confesses to his brother Alan that he prefers his women with young looking earlobes. Older women, he protests, have saggy, draggy lobes that give away their age. Of course, Alan thinks Charlie is an idiot (again). To base whom he dates on the state of their lobes? PREPOSTEROUS!!

Let's stop right there. Do you know where Charlie is coming from? Have you seen a woman wearing earrings so heavy her lobes look like two stretched out pieces of gum? How about someone wearing NO earrings, but their pierced holes are super huge from years of wearing heavy earrings?

I AM very cautious of this happening to me. When I was younger, and my lobes were fresh and full of life (and cartilege), I wore everything, and I even slept in earrings. I had no idea I might be stretching those holes a bit. I even had multpile piercings.

A funny (well, not so funny) thing happened when I turned forty. My stud earrings seemed to point south when I wore them. I found I needed the earring backs with the big, plastic disks. They center the earring and make them upright once again. All of a sudden, I became VERY self conscious of my lobes. I took out all but two piercings. I was vigilant about the weight of the earrings I wore. If I happened to wear a heavy pair one day, I made sure to wear a tiny pair (or none at all) the next. Thankfully, all this extra care has paid off, and my lobes look pretty good, if this old lady does say so herself.

I preach this to Claire all the time. We actually know a girl in her mid 20's who has the saggiest ear holes ever, due to constant wearing of gigantic, heavy hoops. Unless she has surgery (and yes, they do 'ear-tightening' surgery), she'll never recover her once resilient lobes.

I have enough of an issue with health insurance, so I can guarantee I won't EVER have enough money to have ear lobe surgery. Hence, my vigilence. It's better to prevent than repair, anyway......well, as much as possible.

Just recently, I saw an interview on TV conducted by Barbara Walters. I was horrified to see she was wearing earrings so heavy her lobes drooped noticeably. As the interview progressed, I found myself wondering why, with Ms. Walters' money and all the fashion consultants and stylists at her disposal......did NO ONE ELSE notice the lobes but me?

Thus concludes today's PSA. You're welcome :)